Here's something to think about from Craigslist:

One night stand boy,

Thank you for buying me all those fancy, lime-flavored drinks, and thank you for listening to me as I got tipsy and rambled on. Thank you for taking me home and fucking my brains out, thank you! Thanks for being a good guy and having condoms with you, and for wanting to use them, and being a responsible person. Thank you for needing to use more than one, and for having a huge dick. All in all, a wonderful one-night-stand experience.