Clubbing, it's a world of unwritten rules, lots of anxiety and extreme competition. The atmosphere is as fake as the Gucci purse you bought from a street vendor in Bangkok. Luckily for us, the Boston Bachelor has written a comprehensive guide to night clubs.

Some highlights

What’s up with the two girls who are grinding with each other in the middle of the dance floor?

“Pleeease pay attention to us!  Pleeeaaase!”

What's up with the girl who’s in line by herself, checking her cell phone every 20 seconds, keeps looking to the side, with her arms crossed over her chest?

1.  She’s waiting for her friends or boyfriend.

2.  She’s insecure that people will think that she’s going to a club by herself.

What’s up with the meathead who walks around with a perpetual scowl on his face?

He believes that he’s acting like an “alpha male.”  However, this behavior is neither “alpha” nor “male.”

Read the whole guide here: Behind the Bullshit: The Beginner’s Guide to Nightclubs